Forgiveness comes from a longing to be free of the discomfort of feelings that keep you from being whole. The feelings of anger, betrayal, hate, disappointment, hurt, shame, guilt, sorrow, whatever they be, they lie inside of you keeping you trapped within the world that created them. The only way to free your self of them is to leave that world for the world of rightness by seeking to understand what is real.
What is real is that they are not feelings that come from love. Any degree to which you are away from love is the degree to which you are not whole. Forgiveness is actually the act of going towards love, towards wholeness. I want to make one point very clear: forgiveness is for the self. The good news is it’s not contingent on another. Whether you have done something you long to make right or a non rightness has been inflicted upon you, forgiveness does not require another in order for you to be free from the feelings of discomfort that non-forgiveness creates. Your freedom lies within you.
You are a Divine being and you deserve to know what is not real about any act that has created the need for forgiveness. If you have done wrong, make it right inside of yourself. Seek to understand who you became and know you are not that. Recognize that any part of you that was not loving is not the part of you that is loving. Know that the loving one is what is real about who you are, and become that one to the greatest degree you can. That is how you make right non-rightness and forgive yourself for who you became. That is how you assure you do not become that one again.
And if the feelings of discomfort inside of you come from something someone has done to you, know that you are love and no one can touch that which is eternal and real. You do not have to forgive them for what they have done, that is their job. But you must give yourself back to yourself. You must know the feelings you have inside do not serve you, do not bring you comfort, do not give you more of yourself. Seek to find a purpose in your feelings by changing them. No one can do that for you. No one can give you back to yourself, just as no one can take you from yourself. So if you are far from yourself because of something someone else has said or done to you, find your way back. It is not about them, it is about you. It is about you finding or returning to yourself. You are Spirit in human form. From your humanness, embrace your spirit and know that you are greatness. Your greatness needs nothing to be whole. When you are wholly in your greatness you are in a state of grace and love, and from there forgiveness is not necessary, it is a natural outcome.